Cristina is getting a gift today!

Sam just got back from Tulsa last night, and since our anniversary was Tuesday we are going to celebrate it today. Our gift to each other this year - a pack n play for Baby Cristina! haha.....my how things change, right? We'll go looking around today to see what we find. We are going to Taste of Texas for a steak dinner and we are looking forward to it. mmmmm.......all I can think about it steak right now!

Cristina is doing well this week. She is very active and I'm convinced I grew over last weekend. Today is 20 weeks 3 days and according to Babycenter she is the length of a banana now.

Bean is a............

Beautiful and healthy baby GIRL!!!!

I should have updated this blog when we found out last week, but my life has been so crazy lately and I'm running on empty these days. So, rewinding to last week........

Our Moment of Truth

I usually get freaked out about a week before an ultrasound because I'm completely consumed with worry about how my baby is doing in there. I started feeling random flutters a few weeks ago, but nothing consistent and days would go by before I would feel anything. Ultrasound days are so precious because I feel like it's our time to visit with our baby. We see our baby on the screen and watch her move. We hear the heartbeat and talk to her. We tell her we love her and we dream about the day when we will hold her in our arms. How do you explain a love you feel for someone you have never even met? It's the most amazing feeling to see your baby, a piece of you and the person you love right there. So close. Literally a part of you.

We arrived early like we always do and waited in the lobby to get called back. Dr. Rockman was at the hospital delivering not one, but two babies so we were prepared to wait a while. The ultrasound tech called us back to do the ultrasound and this is where we were finally able to give our baby her name. After measuring all of her organs starting with her brain, going to her heart, her kidneys, all the way down to the tip tippy toes, we were told that everything looks great. The tech. asked if we wanted to know Bean's sex at which point Sam pipes up with zero hesitation "Yes!". At first it looked like we wouldn't be able to tell because Bean is incredibly modest. After jiggling my tummy, which I must say was a little embarassing, the tech announced "It's a girl!" We were stunned. I mean, we were completely aware at the fact that we have a 50/50 chance of either, just hearing that Bean was a baby girl was amazing. Even better was hearing that she is completely healthy. I stared at my baby girl and tears filled my eyes. My daughter was right there! So close I could almost reach out and touch her. I'm not sure how many times I told her "I love you, Cristina!" "Mommy loves you so very much!" Sam just kept asking over and over "She's ok, right" "She's healthy, right?" He just needed to hear that his baby girl was just fine. To date, along with the day we found out we are going to be parents, that was the most defining moment of my life. It was a point in time where everything we have been through to become parents came together and made sense.

So, Bean now has an identity of her very own. Her grandparents on both sides are thrilled, her aunts are so proud, her parents are eager to welcome her home. Needless to say, my mother and I have gone nuts buying pink, a color I have always hated. For some reason though, everything I've ever thought in the past is somehow different. I am struggling with the need to provide the very best for my daughter, but trying to figure out what the best really is. I'm a first time mom and I'm so scared that I'll do something wrong or mess something up. I am so thankful for my friends who are moms and for my own mother passing down their wisdom and support. It means more than these ladies, my friends and family will ever know. It's almost like a right of passage of their own. They have gone from being first time mommies to passing down all of their knowledge. It's amazing to see.

Baby Cristina Marie

We have decided that our daughter will be named Cristina Marie in honor of my sister and my mother in law. My sister's name is Cristina and Sam's mother's name was Tina Marie. I'm thinking we may spell her first name with an "h" (Christina) since it's more common, but my sister's name is not spelled with an "h" so it's very difficult for me to add it in there. We'll see.

How Mommy Is Doing at 19 weeks 4 days

I'm FINALLY feeling pregnant! The aches and pains have begun and Cristina has been constantly moving for the past three days now and I feel her on and off throughout the day. So far nothing more than fluttering around, but it's deffinetly there. She even woke me up the other night with her movement. Sam and I are looking forward to the day when he will feel her moving around from the outside, but for now it's just something she and I share. We both realize that we will have to include Daddy in this soon, but it's just nice having this special time with her right now.

I'm noticing that my hips are sore because I'm sure they are spreading now and my back hurts if I sit, stand, walk, or lay down for too long. Pretty much all the time. I get tired easily and it takes every ounce of energy I have to make it through the work day without a nap. I've decided that I'll start bringing my lunch to work with me and scarfing it down and then spend the second half of my lunch taking a quick cat nap to see if that helps. I live for the weekends when I can laze around and take my naps throughout the day and I hate when I have something to do on a weekend that gets in the way of my napping. Sam has been absolutely amazing and I couldn't have asked for a better father for my child. He makes dinner and cleans every single night without fail. He is such an amazing man and I can't wait to see him interact with our daughter. I'm seeing a side in him that is making me fall in love with him even deeper than before. I'm finding Cristina consumes all of my thoughts these days. She's all I think about and all I talk about. I'm sure people get tired of hearing about it, but I honestly don't care. She's all I can focus on at this point. I can't believe that Wednesday will be 20 weeks already! The half-way point! Where does the time go? I'm finding that I'm thinking more and more about Cristina's birthday and I'm very anxious about it. It's terrifying to me, but all that matters is that she's ok and I'll do whatever it takes to make sure she is.

Babycenter says......
That she is the size of a heirloom tomato and weight 8.5 ounces. By Wednesday she'll be as big as a banana! That's a lot of growth in one week!