Well, Sam and I went to see the doctor Friday morning like we were supposed to. That Monday, Dr. Rockman said to come back Friday so we could induce over the weekend. Unfortunately, the hospital we have chosen to deliver at was booked for inductions so the earliest we could get in is Monday (tomorrow) at 5:30 am. I feel so ridiculous that our dates have been all up in the air and changed as many times and it has, but I have to believe that there is a reason for it. I have come to accept the fact that I may quite possible be pregnant for the rest of my life. haha......
So, here we are - my last day of pregnancy and I have all kinds of mixed feelings about it. I am so ready to meet my precious baby girl and to begin our lives together, but I am not quite sure that I'm ready to share her with the world just yet. I love the time we have together when I feel her moving around inside of me. As difficult as this road has been, now that it is coming to an end I can't help but feel a little sad. I surely will not miss the actual physical part of being pregnant at all. I feel so blessed that we will have the baby we were always told we would never have, but the actual pregnancy has been very very difficult and I can't say that I will miss it.
My mom is coming over tonight because we have to be at the hospital at 5:30 am to begin the induction. The doctor will break my water, start pitocin and order my epidural. How in the world are we supposed to get any sleep tonight? Our lives are about to be forever changed! All I can say is bring it on. We are so ready for this. Updates to follow as soon as possible.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Tomorrow Is The Big Day!
Oh my goodness, my little one! I am so nervous and excited about tomorrow! I hope and pray that nothing changes between now and then and I will be able to see your beautiful face this weekend. Your daddy and I are so ready to have you in our arms. I'm praying for a smooth delivery for the both of us (especially you). I can't wait to see you! Mommy loves you more than you will ever know.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
38 Weeks
Today is 38 weeks. I never ever thought we would make it this far, but here we are! We are still waiting on our baby girl to grace us with her presence, and it looks as if it will be sooner rather than later, although I'm trying very hard not to get my hopes up like before.
We went to the doctor Monday and I am now 3 cm dilated. Dr. Rockman talked to me again about induction. Apparently with all of the work we have put into keeping Baby Christina in, my uterus is now confused about what it is it's supposed to do. Imagine that. Not only is my uterus "irritable", but now it's confused. Who would have known? He told me to come back next Monday and we would induce Tuesday, then on my way out he told me to go ahead and come in Friday and we will induce either Friday/Saturday! I really hope I'm not getting my hopes up, but it really looks like this could be it! I'm trying to just relax these last few days, but it's hard to do since I feel like I've been trapped at home as it is.
I can't believe I'll finally be meeting my precious baby girl so soon! I can't wait to see Sam as a daddy and my parents as grandparents. She is so special to all of us and I'm so ready to start my life with her. She'll most likely never understand what a miracle she really is for this family, but I'll never take her for granted.
Sam says that he wants another baby within a year. I say he's crazy and he needs to come back down to earth. People tell me I'll change my mind, since you know, people tend to think they know me better than I know myself, but I am perfectly content with my one and only. I'm so traumatized that I'm scared that if I get pregnant again, my Christina will suffer because of it and I'm willing to do that. How do you tell a little girl that you can't take her out to play because Mommy is on bedrest? It has been hard enough this pregnancy and I don't have any little ones to take care of, but I can't imagine doing that to my girl. All of this has been an incredible learing experience - one I will never forget. I will NEVER tell another pregnant woman to "hang in there", "keep her head up", "it's all worth it". I will NEVER tell another pregnant woman that she'll change her mind about having other children in the future when she feels worse than she has ever felt. I now understand and appreciate the need of just wanting someone to just listen and not say anything or offer and advise. I understand and appreciate the need for validation and to have someone just say that they understand why I would feel that way. It takes a special person to do that, and I'm so thankful that I have a few of those people in my life. Christy's "we'll talk about that later" approach is priceless when it comes to talking about having more children. The look in my mother's eyes when she listens to me going on and on. She never has to say anything at all - she just holds me and that makes everything all better. My sister's excitement about being an aunt to this beautiful baby girl. My husband's unending love and support. Juan and Lorena's excitement about being godparents to our daughter. I am so blessed to have all of these people in my life. I have an amazing support system and I am so thankful for them.
I can't wait to post a birth announcement and pictures! Hopefully very very soon.
We went to the doctor Monday and I am now 3 cm dilated. Dr. Rockman talked to me again about induction. Apparently with all of the work we have put into keeping Baby Christina in, my uterus is now confused about what it is it's supposed to do. Imagine that. Not only is my uterus "irritable", but now it's confused. Who would have known? He told me to come back next Monday and we would induce Tuesday, then on my way out he told me to go ahead and come in Friday and we will induce either Friday/Saturday! I really hope I'm not getting my hopes up, but it really looks like this could be it! I'm trying to just relax these last few days, but it's hard to do since I feel like I've been trapped at home as it is.
I can't believe I'll finally be meeting my precious baby girl so soon! I can't wait to see Sam as a daddy and my parents as grandparents. She is so special to all of us and I'm so ready to start my life with her. She'll most likely never understand what a miracle she really is for this family, but I'll never take her for granted.
Sam says that he wants another baby within a year. I say he's crazy and he needs to come back down to earth. People tell me I'll change my mind, since you know, people tend to think they know me better than I know myself, but I am perfectly content with my one and only. I'm so traumatized that I'm scared that if I get pregnant again, my Christina will suffer because of it and I'm willing to do that. How do you tell a little girl that you can't take her out to play because Mommy is on bedrest? It has been hard enough this pregnancy and I don't have any little ones to take care of, but I can't imagine doing that to my girl. All of this has been an incredible learing experience - one I will never forget. I will NEVER tell another pregnant woman to "hang in there", "keep her head up", "it's all worth it". I will NEVER tell another pregnant woman that she'll change her mind about having other children in the future when she feels worse than she has ever felt. I now understand and appreciate the need of just wanting someone to just listen and not say anything or offer and advise. I understand and appreciate the need for validation and to have someone just say that they understand why I would feel that way. It takes a special person to do that, and I'm so thankful that I have a few of those people in my life. Christy's "we'll talk about that later" approach is priceless when it comes to talking about having more children. The look in my mother's eyes when she listens to me going on and on. She never has to say anything at all - she just holds me and that makes everything all better. My sister's excitement about being an aunt to this beautiful baby girl. My husband's unending love and support. Juan and Lorena's excitement about being godparents to our daughter. I am so blessed to have all of these people in my life. I have an amazing support system and I am so thankful for them.
I can't wait to post a birth announcement and pictures! Hopefully very very soon.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
36 Weeks and Counting!
We are now at 36 weeks 3 days and I am a ticking time bomb. I saw the doctor this past Tuesday and he said that I am 1.5 cm dialated and 80% effaced. My last injection was last Monday and he said that I would give birth in about ten days. So close! He said that if I'm still pregnant through this week, he would start inducing Thursday/Friday. He also said that if I do go into labor before then, that he would do nothing to stop it. Well wouldn't you know that I went to labor and delivery Thursday evening thinking we were going to meet our princess and the doctor stopped my labor! WTF? He said that as long as there is a chance of keeping her in until 37 weeks, he would do it. I am completely on board with that and I appreciate what he is doing, but I just wish he had not told me he would not stop labor and then go and stop it. I'm on strict bedrest now and I'm just waiting to see what happens. My next doctor's appointment is Monday morning and I'm hoping that the contractions I've had this weekend will have caused some changes. We shall see.
Other than that, not much else to report. I have reached the end of my rope and I feel like my body has run out of fuel. I know this is all worth it and blah blah blah, but I am so ready to be through all of this and I'm so ready to be holding my precious baby. I am so disappointed because tomorrow we were going to the baptism class and now that I'm stuck on bedrest we have to wait until the next class, which I believe is sometime in September. I really wanted her to be baptised immediately. It's ok though - it will all work out.
I'm so thankful for my friends and family who have been so patient with me. I've been such a grump lately and I am so grateful to those of you who just listen to my rants and raves. I have not necessarily taken all of this as gracefully as I would have liked, but hey, it's much harder than I expected. Going through this has given me a whole new appreciation for my own mother, and for mothers who choose to go through pregnancy more than once!
Hopefully I'll be able to post a birth announcement in the next week or so!
Other than that, not much else to report. I have reached the end of my rope and I feel like my body has run out of fuel. I know this is all worth it and blah blah blah, but I am so ready to be through all of this and I'm so ready to be holding my precious baby. I am so disappointed because tomorrow we were going to the baptism class and now that I'm stuck on bedrest we have to wait until the next class, which I believe is sometime in September. I really wanted her to be baptised immediately. It's ok though - it will all work out.
I'm so thankful for my friends and family who have been so patient with me. I've been such a grump lately and I am so grateful to those of you who just listen to my rants and raves. I have not necessarily taken all of this as gracefully as I would have liked, but hey, it's much harder than I expected. Going through this has given me a whole new appreciation for my own mother, and for mothers who choose to go through pregnancy more than once!
Hopefully I'll be able to post a birth announcement in the next week or so!
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
It Has Been FOREVER!
I've been meaning to update for a while, but I never seem to get around to much these days. Tomorrow will be 35 weeks and we are quickly closing in on the time when we will hold our precious baby girl! It's funny to me how some days it feels like this pregnancy has lasted forever, but other days, like today, I can't believe how fast this has gone!
Sam and took a childbirth class Saturday and I left the class questioning EVERYTHING. I had no idea how I would make it through, or even if I would be able to. It's strange because it's obvious where babies come from and how they get here, but when you realize that you will be the one going through all of this, it's a real eye-opening realization. Something you just don't understand unless you have been there. Sam was reassured after the class because he felt that now he pretty much knew what to expect. I on the other hand needed a few days to process all of that information. Thank God for my friend Christy. I really don't know how I would have been able to compartmentalize all of that without her. She somehow knows what to say to calm me down and reassure me about all of this. I'm so incredibly blessed to have someone who convinces me that I can do this, even when I really don't believe I can.
Sam and I officially asked Christina's Godparents to be her Godparents about two weeks ago. Juan and Lorena are an awesome couple, and I can't wait for them to meet their Goddaughter in a few weeks! I always knew they would be her Godparents, but it really solidified our decision at my babyshower. Everyone was introducing themselves and when we got to Lorena she said she knew me for however long and then my cousin Vanessa said, "it must be a long time because I know you". They are so involved in our family that my extended family even knows them. My sister also made a comment that she feels like they ARE family. It only makes sense. They are more than just friends now. They are family.
As the time gets closer and closer, I'm getting more and more anxious. I'm working on packing my hospital bag and getting last minute things tied up. I need to buy just a few more things for Baby Christina, but other than that, we are completely ready. It's scary that our lives are changing forever very soon, but it's a change we are ready for. We have waited so long for this moment to arrive. I can't believe that our little miracle is almost here! I can't wait to hold her and feel her skin on mine. I can't wait to hear her little cry. She will never have any idea how loved and wanted she is.
Sam and took a childbirth class Saturday and I left the class questioning EVERYTHING. I had no idea how I would make it through, or even if I would be able to. It's strange because it's obvious where babies come from and how they get here, but when you realize that you will be the one going through all of this, it's a real eye-opening realization. Something you just don't understand unless you have been there. Sam was reassured after the class because he felt that now he pretty much knew what to expect. I on the other hand needed a few days to process all of that information. Thank God for my friend Christy. I really don't know how I would have been able to compartmentalize all of that without her. She somehow knows what to say to calm me down and reassure me about all of this. I'm so incredibly blessed to have someone who convinces me that I can do this, even when I really don't believe I can.
Sam and I officially asked Christina's Godparents to be her Godparents about two weeks ago. Juan and Lorena are an awesome couple, and I can't wait for them to meet their Goddaughter in a few weeks! I always knew they would be her Godparents, but it really solidified our decision at my babyshower. Everyone was introducing themselves and when we got to Lorena she said she knew me for however long and then my cousin Vanessa said, "it must be a long time because I know you". They are so involved in our family that my extended family even knows them. My sister also made a comment that she feels like they ARE family. It only makes sense. They are more than just friends now. They are family.
As the time gets closer and closer, I'm getting more and more anxious. I'm working on packing my hospital bag and getting last minute things tied up. I need to buy just a few more things for Baby Christina, but other than that, we are completely ready. It's scary that our lives are changing forever very soon, but it's a change we are ready for. We have waited so long for this moment to arrive. I can't believe that our little miracle is almost here! I can't wait to hold her and feel her skin on mine. I can't wait to hear her little cry. She will never have any idea how loved and wanted she is.
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